Saturday, May 14, 2011

Sugar and Spice, My Ass: Read It

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Sugar and Spice, My Ass: Beheaded Filler: "I have stuff to do today, like cook dinner, vacuum, solve world hunger, cure cancer, play with my kid. Ya know, all that domestic shit. So..."

I don't know many mothers who have the testicular fortitude to stand up proudly and say "my child does some weird, scary stuff". Moms don't brag about the first time their sweet, precious miracle figures out those little baby fingers can undo diapers after making a poo. Not only can they remove said dirty diaper, the sweet, precious miracle can then use that poo as one would finger paint. Very few mothers tell these stories, but I know every child at some in their baby-body-discovery-development plays with poo while you aren't around to stop them.

It's refreshing to see a blog where the author isn't caught in the "my child is so perfect because that's what I'm supposed to think" cycle. Motherhood is hard and children are strange creatures. But when you refer to your child as "demon spawn" people look at you side-ways, no matter how lovingly you mean it. I know. I've done it in public. Sure he looks cute and well-behaved here, but you should be a fly on my wall sometime.

From ages 5 to 7, my son wanted to be "an evil genius" when he grew up. I'm pretty sure he'd be willing to take over a small nation in his early 30s instead of full global domination. Or maybe he'll be up for world domination. Or maybe he'll just be one of those scholars they interview on the History Channel.

The mom blogs where life is wonderful, the moms are all organized and everything is perfect... bleh. And there houses are clean, they didn't take 10 years to finish a baby-book for their first child and have two other children with 2 other finished baby books...and seem all together. And never even secretly say "could Satan have impregnated me?". Double bleh since my child has AS so, normal and perfect simply do not exist in our world. I have pine branches and ply-wood by my front door with the occasional booby-trap set.

I thank God everyday for posts from real moms who tell it like it is. Children are odd bears. Somehow they exactly how to destroy our sanity. Sometimes a child does something that makes you think "whoa". Or simply "WTF".  This is what life is about, not the existential conversations over trendy cups of coffee, but the real moments of life, especially parenthood.

Read it, see it, live it.

And 5 more days until my husband has brain surgery... so I'm too busy to post very much. 
  

2 comments:

skin_art_junkie said...

Oh wow. I am so incredibly flattered. Thank you for this post. You are completely awesome. I'm now going to share this on FB so all my friends can see how awesome you think I am. :D Thank you! *imitation of Halle Barry accepting Oscar*

Unknown said...

Thanks for sharing this with your friends! I meant what I said and said what I meant. :)